Becoming a better friend to yourself

CB_MIrror-224x300I had an experience recently of being in an ornery mood, so I went outside to “get away from it.” As I was settling into the fresh air, away from my bad mood, I realized of course that the mood “followed me.”  I just had to laugh at my effort to “get away from myself.”
I spent most of August by myself.
I’ve been on a personal retreat, taking time to integrate many new things that I’ve been learning and to have time for reflection, contemplation, and integration. I know that I have had plenty of moments like the one above, where I try to “get away from myself” for one reason or another. But this time, I was able to become aware of the dynamics within the pattern and have a gentle laugh about it.
Taking some time away from others, to be really alone and in a reflective state of mind offers this kind of awareness. It’s not always fun living with an inner grump.  It takes effort and intention to transform my inner world into an authentically happier place.

Inch by inch I make my way to becoming a better friend to myself.

I regard healing as a process of moving toward a more peaceful and fun inner world, and “health” as the ongoing return to contentment, vitality and joy in body, mind and spirit.
May you always have time and space to know and enjoy yourself.

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Cindy Black

Cindy Black is the Founder of Big Tree School of Natural Healing and the author of Meridian Massage, Pathways to Vitality. She is appreciated for her ability to make the complex accessible, fun, and practical.


  1. gayathri on May 25, 2016 at 1:52 am

    Hi cindy, thanks for sharing courageously. Awareness is inded the key and once you observe the emotion itself it dissipates like vapor.
    Blessings Gayathri

    • Cindy Black, L.Ac., LMT on May 25, 2016 at 8:22 am

      You are welcome, thank you for writing.
      Wishing you all the best

  2. Lorrie on May 24, 2016 at 11:25 pm

    As a massage therapist, it’s important that I practice what I preach. And so for over a year now, I’ve been working on what I call my radical self care program, which is so similar to being a good friend of yourself. As I tell people, the more I do, the better therapist, mother, sister and friend I am. The more I do it, the more I share about it. The more I share, the more others give themselves permission to do it. And we all pay it forward in the most beautiful of ways.

    • Cindy Black, L.Ac., LMT on May 25, 2016 at 8:25 am

      Hi Lorrie,
      Thank you for offering your inspiration and experience here. We all learn from each other – I’m sure many (in addition to myself) will be inspired by your comment.
      I love how you have expressed it here, pay it forward! 🙂
      Thanks again for adding your experience and wisdom.

  3. Genesis M. Roy, LMT, ISHA on May 24, 2016 at 3:21 pm

    Thanks Cindy … I can relate I call it the snake skin shedding moments … lol … but I love the selfie what a way to take a look at oneself and then I say, do I really look like that, haha .. then song tunes start flowing … “What’s it All About” and instead of saying “Alfie” I say, “Genesis” … and the process goes on and on until I have a good laugh at my self … lol … Blessings & Love <3

    • Cindy Black, L.Ac., LMT on May 24, 2016 at 4:21 pm

      Thanks Genesis.

  4. Mikki on September 14, 2014 at 12:48 am

    Hi Cindy,
    I have “Scrooge Grump” as an aspect of myself. When I am in that part of myself, I feel envious to see people radiate joy and contentment; so I resonated with your blog. The reminder you inspired in me is to take time to be alone with myself and to make sure I am being nurtured in some way during that contemplation/ alone time so I can shift out of that space.

    • Cindy Black, L.Ac. on September 14, 2014 at 9:06 pm

      Hi Mikki,
      Thanks for sharing your experience and perspective. It can take a whole village to cheer up a grump! 🙂

  5. Yolanda on September 12, 2014 at 9:17 am

    Thanks for sharing Cindy. This resonates well with me. It is a daily journey but an important one to help maintain good health. Healthy and happy is my continuous goal.

    • Cindy Black, L.Ac. on September 12, 2014 at 11:09 am

      Hi Yolanda,
      I like your goal – I’m with you!

  6. Heather on September 11, 2014 at 12:47 pm

    How authentic, real and courageous you are Cindy. You inspire me to be the same.

    • Cindy Black, L.Ac. on September 12, 2014 at 11:08 am

      Thanks Heather! 🙂

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